In the past year, I have only painted three paintings, all of which were for Emerson's nursery. And, if I hadn't felt the desperate (hormonal) need to fully decorate her room, I would have had a completely art-free year. This may not seem like a big deal, but for me it is. I cannot live without creating. I must create or there is a big old empty hole in me, less color and liveliness in my spirit, and the feeling that I am without a purpose. Such is the life of an artist.
Since I had absolutely ZERO energy for the entirety of my pregnancy, I poured all my creative energy into writing this blog (which, coincidentally made it what it is today). But, over the past week or so I have had a giant burst of inspiration and creative excitement. I'm not exactly sure what the catalyst for this new wave of creative energy was, but I am generating ideas left and right (god, it's been so long since I could say that!) and have been devoting as much time as I can manage, in my crazy life as the mother to a rambunctious 5-month-old baby, to working on my fine art photography, painting, writing, and (at a very slow pace) my portraiture business. Of course, in the past that would have meant spending every moment from the time I got out of bed until the time I went to sleep at night totally focused and working….but, alas, times have changed. I do what I can during nap times (with the baby sleeping ON ME) and have been able to sneak in a half hour of painting here and there (sigh, I used to paint in five-hour stretches).
I have a big piece of canvas that I have been lugging around from place to place for years, and at one time started a painting of birch bark on it that went totally awry….hated it. Now, it will tell the story of our family with little bits of nostalgia all over it. It might just take me forever to finish with the mini-sessions I've been putting in on it. But, it feels SO good to paint! Creating reminds me of the woman, the individual, I am underneath the conjoined super being: EmersonMama (sidenote-we really need a uni-name/portmanteau like Brangelina).
|The very beginning...|