Tuesday, January 31, 2012

28 weeks

I am officially in my third trimester! The countdown begins, the hypnobirthing classes begin, the doula appointments begin, the nesting is out of control and I basically live at my midwives' office. It's an exciting time and one of great focus. I've gone from being a mostly sedentary pregnant creature, to a fury of activity, insanely needing to accomplish a list of to-do's every day that feel supremely important and vital to me….most of which leave my husband scratching his head and questioning me. For example, the other day I needed to take out the nontoxic wood polish and scrub every rung on our banister, every stair on the staircase, and every inch of the railing. I felt so much better prepared for this baby after doing that, meanwhile my husband stood cursing in the nursery while he tackled "real" necessities like giving the baby a room of her own. It's funny how I can feel like I'm making progress when my house still looks like a disaster area, all because I know all 29 of its windows have been washed, I've organized the tea in the kitchen cupboard, and 12-months worth of hand-me-down baby clothing has been washed twice, rinsed an extra time, folded and arranged by size. You gotta love nesting!

I have been having dreams about this baby basically since I conceived, but this past week I started having visions while awake, as if I can see imprints of the future in otherwise empty rooms. I woke up the other morning and when I opened my eyes I had such a clear vision of my baby girl lying next to me on the bed—her cherub-like face, her soft blonde hair, her rosy full lips, and her big eyes looking up at me. I could see in her eyes that I was her mama, her world, her favorite place to be. Although it was just a vision, it was the first time I had experienced a child looking at me that way and it was one of the most intense feelings I've ever experienced. It took my breath away. I can't believe that will soon be a daily reality. And, as hormonally charged (read: crazy) as my husband thinks I am when I emotionally speak about things such as having baby visions, I was able to describe a vision to him of the first time he holds baby girl that brought a tear to his eye….so I don't think I'm alone in the overwhelming anticipation of this child's arrival. 

Friday, January 27, 2012

against the grain

I make unpopular decisions. I always have. I'm sure part of it is due to my independent nature. I recently read that it is also a quality shared by most introverts (which I definitely am) thanks to our ability to tune in to our inner world to reflect on what we are feeling and experiencing, then think things through thoroughly and independently. Either way, it seems I rarely make decisions that are easily accepted by the masses (or those around me). I listen to my gut instead of to others, it's that simple and it doesn't feel like a choice. I feel physically ill and my sanity threatened when I don't make decisions that are in line with my true desires or what is really best for me—it's a blessing to be that sensitive to my world, but it's not easy.

The deeper into adulthood I climb, the more important my decisions become, the more I've realized how independent my thinking is and unpopular my decisions are. Expecting a child and making decisions about how to be pregnant, how to birth, and how to parent is probably the best example I have of this. There are so many decisions to be made from the time you conceive, each one defining who you are as an individual and mother, and what kind of environment and experience you want to create for your child. And I take my decisions very seriously. I've done an insane amount of reading, I've listened to other women's stories, I've asked a lot of questions, I've reflected on my childhood experiences, and I've talked with 9 different midwives, 2 OBGYNs and 1 doula since I began the process of conceiving and expecting. 

I'd say my decisions are pretty well-informed. They are absolutely the right decisions for me and I deeply believe in the parenting practices my husband and I intend to utilize. But, I've had to endure the onslaught of disapproval, criticism, judgement, unsolicited opinions and sometimes borderline outrage over my decisions that is so common during pregnancy and parenting. As common as it is, I am still deeply offended by it. Could there by anything more personal or intimate than your uterus, your vagina, or your flesh and blood? Why our society has become so warped in the way we interact with pregnant women and mothers is beyond me. Why we do so little to support this sacred, beautiful transition and honor the unique ways in which each woman would like to experience it is beyond me. And the fact that pregnancy and birth have been so taken over by the medical community that most women are completely resigned to listening to doctors, disconnecting from their bodies, and ignoring or not even attempting to tune in to their own wisdom, is such a tragedy in my mind.

I will step off my soap box now. I just find this issue has become more and more intense as I approach the end of pregnancy. I am exhausted by the questions, the prying into my personal decisions, all while I am trying to maneuver this completely new and foreign experience the best I can. This is a time I would so love to have my wisdom regarding my own body, my child and the family my husband and I are creating respected. It's a time that I'd so love to be able to talk openly and freely about how I've decided to do this, but instead must protect my experience and unpopular decisions from anyone outside of the birth support circle I've been lucky enough to create for myself. The silver-lining to all this is that I've never felt more confident and strong in who I am so, in a way, I thank all the authors, groups and people I know who have voiced their disapproval. Having to make decisions of this caliber and defy the direction the current runs has made me into the kind of mother I was hoping to be. Now I just have to survive the next 18+ years of unsolicited critiques of my parenting. Piece of cake:)   

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

winter gloom

Fog City, Massachusetts. This has been the scene outside my windows for weeks….sigh. I desperately wanted to move to the mountains, I wanted cold weather and constant snow. Though we didn't make it to a large mountain range, to a mountain we did move. Granted it's a very small mountain, but it's been quite evident since the beginning of winter that it is enough of a mountain to alter our lifestyle drastically. It's always 15 degrees cooler up here and seems to always be snowing just a little bit, even though the weather hardly ever predicts it. When we drive down the hill (45 minutes!) to get groceries it's suddenly warmer and the ground is absent of any white stuff. But, that drive down the hill is often impassable and incredibly treacherous…..so I'm stuck inside looking at the gloom or walking down to the general store where everybody knows everybody and nobody is concerned with not being able to get off the mountain because they have a freezer full of meat they shot and killed themselves and a pantry full of canned produce that they grew in their backyard over the summer. I think I was successful in finding the exact opposite of the last place I live, that's for sure.  

I seem to be forever restless and constantly wondering if that will ever change. So far, it hasn't happened. I suppose what has changed in me is that I am able to quiet the impulse and not act on that restlessness. It just seems that no matter how wonderful a place I am living, I always have a wandering eye. 

I hated that I grew up in Connecticut so I chose the farthest point in the U.S. away from it and made sure it was a place that was always warm: San Diego. Of course, I got there and it really was incredibly different in every way…and I couldn't stand it. So, up to San Francisco I went in search of earth-crunchy, intelligent people and a breathtaking landscape. As much as I loooooooved San Francisco, I was oddly homesick for boring Connecticut after a few years. Back to Connecticut I went, but this time it was to the Gold Coast, which is basically a mini-NYC, rife with Wall Street yuppies, an intense money culture and so much smog that my childhood asthma returned after a 17-year hiatus. That was the point when I suddenly started craving small-town living, mountains full of fresh air, friendly people that bring you bowls of peaches when you move in (this did happen), and a hippie community. Well, here I am. And I love it….yet, looking out at that winter fog I find myself daydreaming of someplace else. But, you know, I think I'm okay with that feeling. I'm constantly seeking, constantly dreaming, constantly hitting the refresh button on my life. And I hope that never changes.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

27 weeks

I can't believe this is the final week of my second trimester. Next week I will begin the final stretch. It's absolutely insane! And it might be a little early to be saying this, but I kind of can't wait to not be pregnant anymore. Like everything else about pregnancy, it's a mixed emotion—I'm elated at the thought of being able to bend and twist my body any which way I choose, sleeping without 45 pillows propping up various body parts and maybe not being in pain when doing so, enjoying a cup of coffee and a caesar salad (perhaps not together though), being able to run instead of waddle. But, of course, I know I will also feel a twinge of sadness when the journey is over because there is something tremendously special about being pregnant and being thisclose to my baby girl at all times. Part of me feels like the minute she leaves my body she will be leaving for college the next day and that…..well, it makes my heart hurt. 

But, really, the end of pregnancy is not the most comfortable of times. Something shifted in my body last week and I reached a new stage in which I like to exclaim "I'm just too pregnant!" followed by some sort of animal-sounding grunt that could only escape a pregnant woman's mouth. This usually happens when I try to lift myself off the couch, get into bed at night or dress myself. So I've been wondering why there isn't a manual every pregnant woman receives that is filled with practical how-to's and solutions. I don't mean the standard "you're going to feel like throwing up. When this happens eat some ginger, munch on crackers, never leave your stomach completely empty." I'm talking about "you're not going to be able to put on your own underwear, pants or socks. When this happens find yourself a pair of tongs with extra long handles and use these as an extension of your own arm to pull those suckers on." Really, the list of things you can no longer maneuver is quite extensive, I think it'd make good sense for someone to come up with some solutions. It's just not practical to assume I have someone following me around all day putting lotion on my legs for me, picking up everything I drop on the floor and cannot retrieve, or spoon feeding me because I cannot reach my plate at the table. I mean, I nearly severed a toe attempting to cut my own toenails the other day. That doesn't seem fair.

It seems unnatural to transition into a sappy pregnancy sentiment after everything I just said, so I'll leave it at that for the week:)

Monday, January 23, 2012

where's this all going?

When I started this blog I simply wanted a place to post some pictures and surface-level thoughts as I played around with my photography. After almost a year though, I had a more concrete plan and started posting every day. I had many reasons for this—it was a way to hold myself accountable, to feel committed to working on my photography/business/creative journey, it was a way to make sure I was always writing, it was an outlet, it was something I believed would help me stay on my path and arrive at whatever destination the Universe had in store for me. And I had clear-cut topics for this blog for quite a while. Then I got pregnant. 

Sadly, I haven't found myself very artistically inspired since I've been pregnant and that's a fact that I really struggle with. But, that's not to say I am not inspired. I feel inspired to write, to put my experience out there for what it's worth. I tried to keep the pregnancy posts to a minimum at first, but it's been the greatest source of writing material I've had in my life next to heartache (go figure). So I've been writing, and you've been reading. In fact, more and more people have flocked to this humble little blog since I began writing about pregnancy. So how could I stop? But, I often wonder where this is all going. I am still an artist above all, I still have goals and dreams for my life as an individual and I hope to get back to all that when it's possible. But, my blog has slowly morphed into a motherhood/parenting blog, and I'd wager it will continue once my little bean arrives (the greatest source of inspiration imaginable). I have a feeling this will all make sense someday soon though…I have a feeling that becoming a mother is closely tied to the direction I am meant to travel career-wise. Stay tuned….

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

maternity shots

I still haven't figured out how/when I will have maternity shots taken. I realized this morning that time is quickly passing me by so I might want to start thinking about that, which led me to head over to Flickr in search of some inspiration. Just a few…

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

26 weeks

I've reached the rapidly expanding phase of pregnancy (two thirds of the way there, baby!)—my pants look/feel like they were painted on, the double chin is in full effect, my once mid-thigh length shirts now barely cover my belly, and trying to put my own socks and shoes on is not only painful, but a job I have to outsource many a day. This is it, the end is barreling toward me. I had the realization the other day that I could give birth in just 10 weeks with my midwives (36 weeks is the cut-off, before then is considered premature). That is just crazy. And it set my mind racing with endless lists of things still to be done before this little peach arrives. This is not helping my insomnia. 

The nursery is STILL not done on account of yet another list of unforeseeable hiccups in the reno project. This fact is killing me softly. The house is piling up with baby gear and my nesting hormones are relentless. Please Universe, stop putting obstacles in our way so I can get this frickin' room done!!! I will say, though, that I am pretty excited about the design I've put together for the room. More on that soon.

I cannot say how accurate mother's intuition is, but I do know that I feel it all the time. I've mentioned that I often feel like I know so much about this baby and her personality already. I get the sense that she is so ready to live life. She constantly remains at the bottom of my uterus, as close as possible to her exit route. I can sense her independence even though she's still completely reliant on me at the moment. She is strong and has an incredible presence about her. She is stubborn. She knows what she wants. She is driven.

As is evident from my completely transition-less writing today, my mind has become a scattered mess of thoughts punctuated with passing anxieties. Everything feels so urgent at this point, everything. I realize that is biology doing its thing, coaxing me to prepare for this monumental event, but that fact doesn't erase the urgency. I've also been worrying that the heightened sense of urgency coupled with baby girl's zeal to live life means she's coming early. Gulp. Of course, that could also be because my sister-in-law put that idea in my head, followed by her 3-year-old prophet-of-a-daughter (the same one who told me I was pregnant the day after I conceived) told me the baby was going to come out now (then again, she also told me the baby would be born April 27th at night). I suppose only time will tell, so in the meantime I'm going to go attack my house with non-toxic furniture polish and make about a billion lists of to-dos, color-coded by priority level.

Monday, January 16, 2012

the bond of pregnancy

Pregnancy is a funny thing. In one way, it is a very isolating experience given you are the only one who can go through it. No one can join you in all the aches and pains, the worries and fears that keep you up at night, the months of nausea, the magic and bonding between you and your unborn baby, the bizarre sensation of all your body parts stretching, moving, and morphing into a completely new arrangement, the crazy impatience and excitement, or the intense odyssey that is childbirth. Sure, you can look to others to emotionally support you through all of that, you can find hands to hold and shoulders to cry on. But, ultimately, it's all yours. 

At the same time, pregnancy bonds you to others in a profound way, a completely unique way, an ever-lasting way. You may feel more connected to and appreciative of your own parents. You may feel closer than previously possible to the women in your life who have children. You may feel a deeper kind of affection for other people's children. And then there is your spouse. This is the person who is in the trenches with you, the one who shares those hilarious/gross/surprising/troubling moments when your body does something unexpected, the one who witnesses the ebb and flow of your insane hormones, the one who brings you a glass of water after you regurgitate your supper, the one who hears that tiny heartbeat for the first time with you….the one who has given you the gift of half their DNA, the one whose love melted with yours to create this little being that only the two of you can share a similar experience of.

I was reflecting back on the experience of conceiving and being pregnant with my husband the other night as I prepared to leave for a 4-day trip up to Saratoga. As I mentioned last week, I was run out of my house by an insanely invasive construction project that made this a completely unmanageable environment for a pregnant lady. But, it was so hard to leave. My hormones were shouting "don't leave your nest!" and my heart was aching in a way that felt familiar, yet somehow entirely new. The whole time I was away I needed to hear my husband's voice on the phone 3 times a day in order to remain sane.

My husband and I have been ridiculously attached to one another since our very first date. We admittedly don't like to spend much time away from one another and have a rule to never be apart more than 5-7 consecutive days, which honestly very rarely ever happens. And when we are together at home, we can usually be found holding hands, hugging, snuggling or the like at constant intervals (this is, of course, broken up by us spending time alone doing our own thing because, ironically, I would go nuts without my space and time alone). But, since I've been pregnant, the dynamic has shifted. I seem more detached, less affectionate, more introspective and less talkative to my husband. The interesting thing is, though, I've never felt more attached to him. I may act more aloof, but I need him in ways I cannot explain. He is the only one who has seen the cumulative experience, the one who understands (as much as is possible) my current (yet constantly changing) emotional state, my needs, and my limitations….and more importantly, he doesn't pass judgement on any of it. He is the one who talks to this baby as much as I do, the one who knows what my pregnant body looks like naked, the one who cooks my meals and rubs my back, the one who has become so protective of me and his unborn child.

My trip away last week brought me back home to my husband. It was a chance to reflect on this journey, and realize that we're doing all right despite the craziness that is our life. Things have changed, for sure, but we are in this together regardless of whether we fall asleep spooning or with me pushing his arm off of me because my pregnant body needs space. And we love each other in a way that we couldn't before all this began.  

Relationships change when you have a child. That I knew. But, what I've experienced is that they begin to shift and change from the moment you decide to try to conceive. Every relationship I have now feels different—it's a wonderful, confusing, life-altering, surprising thing. I feel as if my life and environment are being stretched, moved and morphed into an entirely new arrangement along with my body parts. And somehow, I just know that all of these changes are setting the foundation for a new life to begin—not just the life of my unborn baby girl, but the life I was meant to live. My relationships with others will never be the same. Nothing will ever be the same. This is the beginning, and I wouldn't want to have anyone other than my husband by my side.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012


This is the week that my house is full of construction workers…and it's just about as fun as I anticipated. On the one hand, it's great to get so many big projects out of the way before the baby arrives. On the other hand, I am in full-on nesting mode and although it's a bloody zoo in here, I do not want to leave my house. But, after two days of dealing with loud, crazy, inappropriate construction workers who like to hit on me and discuss my pregnant body and breastfeeding with me (seriously, I thought I'd be safe from being hit on because I'm pregnant! so creepy) I've had enough. This mama bird is fleeing her nest and heading to Upstate New York for a few days. I'll be blogging from the road…

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

25 weeks

I was never very good at sharing food. I could probably blame it on my crazy high metabolism, which requires a constant stream of fuel….but, I think I'm just selfish with food. And now I'm pregnant. This means my husband has to really watch his step when entering the kitchen. I know sometimes I'm irrational, but there are pregnant ways of being I can't ignore, like the fact that the scent of fresh pineapple is the most intoxicating scent to me right now and I NEED to consume an enormous bowl of it every morning and I  WILL notice if even one piece is missing from my stockpile in the fridge. The list of food in the house that my husband is not allowed to touch extends far beyond pineapple at this point though. It's pretty insane for me to expect him to ask my permission every time he has a snack, but what can I say….it'd be nice. I thought he had learned his lesson after the Carmel Greek Yogurt incident, in which he got reamed out so badly for indulging in a few of "mine" that he drove 30 minutes out of his way to buy me 3 cases of it the next day. But, I guess he forgot that lesson learned, because I just sat down with a nice cup of tea to accompany the one oatmeal raisin cookie I had waiting for me in the cabinet…and it was gone. Unacceptable.

Another fun change concerning food is the fact that my belly has become a food catching device. I can't figure out if I have always dribbled water out of my mouth when I drink and lost pieces of my meal while I eat, and just never noticed because there was nothing to stop its fall before. Or, have I just become a more slovenly eater since I've been knocked up? I'm not sure, but I seem to always have water drips and food stains down my front these days. Lovely. I guess it's preparing me for motherhood though, when I'll always have some form of spit-up, food, snots or pee on my clothes at any given time. 

All that aside, I am euphoric these days with every reminder of the sweet reward that will come at the end of this crazy journey. I constantly have dreams about giving birth and holding my baby girl, and it's exciting every time. Holding her in my dreams somewhat satisfies my impatience. Ahhhh……15 more weeks!

Monday, January 9, 2012

placenta art

Before I got pregnant, I had no idea there was a list of things you could do with your placenta. In fact, I wasn't even entirely clear what a placenta was. I quickly learned all about placentas, but was not prepared to be questioned about it in the that way I have. When I switched midwives about a month ago, the new practice asked me what I wanted to do with my placenta once it was delivered. And then at Christmas, there was a long discussion over dessert about my placental intentions. I have mad love for the miracle organ my body has manufactured, but how far does that love go? Does it mean storing it in my freezer, making art prints out of it (see above), planting it under a fruit tree in the backyard? I really don't know. All these questions got me thinking so I started researching it and couldn't believe some of the things I found—preserved placenta necklaces, placenta teddy bears (the idea is too grotesque for me to handle so I couldn't bear to post a picture—if you're curious, click here), encapsulation (which involves ingesting pills made out of your placenta to help your body re-acclimate after childbirth), and sautéing it up with rosemary and garlic (hold on, nauseous now…). As squeamish as this topic makes me, I obviously found it intriguing enough to research:)  

Friday, January 6, 2012

random baby cuteness

I got this "baby bouquet" for Christmas, something I've never seen before (the flowers unroll into clothing). So much cuter than a three-tier diaper cake! I almost didn't want to ever disassemble it.

Thursday, January 5, 2012


It's amazing how quickly and drastically things change when you buy a house and get knocked up. Our focus has completely shifted, our conversations revolve around previously foreign topics, our weekend activities reflect a totally new lifestyle. And unlike the first three years of our relationship (during which changes happened gradually), these changes happened overnight.

I will state this as a disclaimer: we are both beyond thrilled to be having this baby and wouldn't trade her for anything. We cannot wait to meet her and smother her with love. Now that I've said that, I can admit that I've spent a great portion of this pregnancy trying to catch my breath, trying to find a comfortable place…a place that makes sense…amidst all these enormous life changes. I like to have to remind myself constantly that this has all been more intense given there is so much on my plate—living in our first house, trying to navigate the many repairs/projects/financial sucks that go along with being homeowners, living in a new state, trying to become part of a new community/find friends, being pregnant, trying to figure out what to do with my career. But, the fact is it all happened at once. It doesn't help to daydream about simpler times or imagine what life would be like right now had our "perfect plan" actually come to fruition. The simpler times are gone, and the universe discarded our plan and handed us what we have today. So, I am here, trying to digest this little by little and iron out the chaos.

As a side note—we thought Alex would have his pick of jobs because he always has. We planned on moving to a boarding school where we would be given a free house to live in with virtually no bills to pay for years so we could save up tons of money to eventually buy a house and support our family. We'd raise our babies in a close-knit/built-in community without the stress of commuting, daycare, or bills. It'd be no problem for me to stay home with the kids during their early years. I could slowly build up my art career without the pressure of needing to bring home the bacon. Doesn't that sound perfect? It did to us.

There are several cliché phrases you hear about pregnancy—"there is no right/perfect time, you have to just go for it if you want children," "nothing can prepare you for what you'll go through when you experience pregnancy/become a parent," "having a child changes everything." As cliché as these phrases are, they are absolutely true! They are true in a way you can't understand until it happens to you and you suddenly find yourself saying "oh crap! This is what they meant." You can devise a "plan" all you want for attacking trying to conceive, pregnancy, and becoming parents, but it will all shake down the way it's going to shake down.  You cannot control it (something I have had to repeat to myself a billion times over the last year). 

My experience: I read everything ever written on conceiving a child, ate a perfect diet, took all the right vitamins and supplements, had weekly acupuncture, kept myself calm with yoga and meditation, exercised, charted my Basal Body Temperature every morning, peed on ovulation predictor strips…and it happened on its own, when I didn't feel like I was "trying." Next up, pregnancy. I always imagined I'd love being pregnant, that I'd feel healthy and vital and charged to get things done, that my life wouldn't change all that much until the child came…but EVERYTHING about my life has changed since I was only 7 weeks pregnant. I hated being pregnant for the first four months, and even now that I'm feeling better and love this belly, I've still never felt weaker or less productive and other than writing this blog, I struggle to find any small piece of my life that still feels like it is mine. Then there's becoming a parent—I already feel and act like a parent to this little girl, but I have yet to experience actually having a baby in the house 24/7 that I am completely responsible for, so I can only speculate…but I'd wager my "plans" and visions will only be laughed at once again.

Don't get me wrong, this is an incredible experience, one that I am certain is shaping me into a better version of myself than I've ever been, but there is more truth than most people share. Or maybe it's just that when we hear veterans tell us stories, it doesn't reverberate inside us the way it would if we could grasp the intensity of the situation from personal experience. Either way, it's felt more like a string of surprises than anything I could have prepared myself for. But, I guess that's what life is, isn't it? The trick is being able to surrender to it all, to accept things as they come rather than create anxiety by trying to predict them (not a strong suit of mine). The trick is being willing to let go of everything you've known before so you can become something new, because life is not going to stop changing on account of your resistance.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

24 weeks

It's interesting to look back at the evolution of my New Year's Eve celebrations the last few years. Four years ago, I had only been dating my husband for two weeks—there were lots of drinks involved, people throwing up in the bathroom, and I had to serve as our designated driver. Three years ago, I was newly engaged—we turned down an invitation to go to some newfangled rave club in NYC that featured naked women with mermaid tails swimming in large fish bowls suspended from the ceiling…and instead went to see Avatar at the IMAX 3D theater, came home and had one drink each. Last year, I was newly married—we spent the evening with a 2-year-old, no drinks. This year, I was pregnant—although I had a friend over during the day who kept mentioning New Year's Eve, it didn't click that it actually was New Year's Eve that night (I kept thinking it was days away). Neither my husband nor I realized it was NYE until 5:30 pm! We discussed how boring the holiday has become for us over the years as we placed our hands on my growing belly and shouted every time our tiny dancer kicked. We caught up on this season's Office episodes and were in bed by 10:00 pm. Life is clearly changing.

The most exciting part of it being 2012 is that this is my baby girl's year! Soon enough she will make her entrance into this world and a new chapter of life will begin. I am growing incredibly impatient for that day to arrive—with every kick to the belly, I am crazy yearning to pull her out and into my arms to cuddle. As much as I want to slow down and enjoy these last few months alone with my husband, the last few months our lives will ever be this quiet, it's hard to do when I think about this little being I've waited my whole life to meet. It's quite similar to how I felt before I started dating my husband—so incredibly difficult to wait for my soulmate to arrive. 

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

house projects

There is SO much going on in our house right now. It seems all the major house projects we've had in the works for a while are all reaching critical points and will be finished within the next few weeks….from nursery renovations to dinning room renovations to new doors being installed to a new heating system that will turn our house into a complete construction zone for an entire week. I absolutely canNOT wait for the house to reach a place of calm, something I haven't experienced since we moved in. 

Dinning room renovations: deciding between these two colors…

Martha Stewart Fennel Seed

Martha Stewart Bayou

And hanging this chandelier:

This week, my husband will put the finishing touches on the nursery renovations that he has been working on for months! It's been frustrating all around to transform that room into a usable space, and my husband's limited free time has not made it any easier. But, the walls and ceilings have been de-wallpapered and patched and the room painted a comforting shade of buttery cream (color on the right, Benjamin Moore Sugar Cookie). It has just enough yellow in it to bring a little sunshine into what is a very dark room. The next step is moving the crib and dresser in and working on the MANY decorative touches I have dreamt up. The first is choosing the main fabric for the room, out of which my amazing and talented friend Hannah will make curtains, a crib skirt and possibly some throw pillows. Here are the fabrics I'm considering:

Another idea I'm contemplating is hanging handmade 3D flowers on the walls. Either small ones like these above the crib:

Or large ones like these, which I'd hang in the corners or on one wall of the room (these are hanging on the wall at the amazing coffee house/restaurant/art shop/general store down the street): 

Then I'd like to recreate this painting that I will hang in a gallery display on one wall of the nursery with other pieces of art I will make/buy (painting by Mati Rose):

Another piece of art I'd like to recreate using fabric:

Phew! Lots going on in this house! I will post the end results soon!